Tuesday, February 2nd, 2021
Tony lost his father last week; he didn’t get a chance for a last visit because he’s sitting in the Wright County Jail. That’s pain number one.
He and his girlfriend of long standing both have mental health issues that put them on the fringes of society. That’s pain number two.
He went to visit her three weeks ago, but she didn’t answer the door when he knocked and knocked and knocked. So he grabbed a ladder from the side of the house and put it up against her bedroom window. The neighbors called the police who came in a flash and arrested him. That’s pain number three.
Pain number four is the worst of all. He and his girlfriend understand each other, and they are all each other has. Because of the ladder incident, Tony was served with a do-not-contact order and barred from seeing or being with his girlfriend. I last talked to Tony last week, and he informed me he was going to court the next day and was afraid the judge would make the order permanent. Here was a grown, tough-looking man who wept as if his life was being taken away from him. [I visit in the jail by Zoom.]
Then he asked me a question that put me back on my heels. “Can you personalize my pain, Chaplain, or am I just an object of pity. How would you feel if the only person you loved was taken away from you?” That started a whole new conversation in which I got into his pain on a personal basis and almost came to tears myself.
I’ll be meeting with Tony this afternoon and will find out the outcome of his hearing last week. This time, I’ll be ready to personalize his pain. You could pray for that meeting, if you will. And you could think about what it would mean to you if the person you loved with all your heart was taken away from you. Then you’ll be able to personalize your prayer for Tony.
Tags: Compassion, Empathy, Jail, Pain
February 3rd, 2021 at 6:33 pm
I will certainly pray for you, Tony and his girlfriend.
Myron